undeserving

i am fine not to receive attention or compliments
i prefer to be low-keyed and have low profile
i could not put myself in the spotlight and taking key roles
as the matter of fact (i despise them)
i felt a sense of hypocrisy and pride

not that i am over qualified
or extra special
or very important person

as in the bible, everyone is given talent and gifting to serve in different entity to build up the Body of Christ in one
Thus, i am very sensitive when i pick up the scent that brings to mind:

(1) Will this affect the unity?
(2) Is this way appropriate?
(3) Can i use a method more amiable (pleasant)?
(4) is this a freewill or command streak?

- i will not take things personal, nor i keep grudge (issue does not make the person anything less)

- each matter is particular and should not be tangled with recent issue (dig up grave mentality) unless one uses undeserving words upon me ( ok to be not appreciated but should not say i did not do the things which i actually had done , i do things usually when i am on my own, not that i need constant appreciation but i will not tolerate LIARS )

The bible says in Matthew 6:

1"Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

2"So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.

3But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Perhaps we are more familiar with these in the chapter:


- the Lord's prayer
- keeping treasure in heaven not earth
- do not worry about tomorrow

We often neglect the first half of the chapter