running without a pause

in the past,
when i told myself that it was over
i forgave myself and others
i no longer remember
"put it behind me"
"whoosh...all gone"

but when i crossed the roads........why did the cars come so near me?
when i walked down the stairs......why did my knees go wobbly?
when i talked....jammed, where am i? (confused)
i just shut down and shut up!

and i could not find the reasons
or comprehend
what is the rationality?

could not make a sense out of it

then i came out with the only logical explanation possible
when conciousness cave in, it falls into subconciousness
where thoughts are not in words and understanding
but fragments, bits, essence, senseless senses

subconcious running mode (non-stop, operates even during sleeping and waking hours)

my subconcious is so strong
that it gives birth to creativity and absurbness
that it blocks things from coming in and blocks thoughts from flowing out

congested in fermentation of thoughts

now....

much better if not passed away....
praise God

Not only i bounce back faster
i seem to be able to conjure information faster
convey messages in a humanly understood realm

even when i prayed,....
those words of thanksgiving, petition and requests just pour out freely

i felt that a steady and never-ceasing clean stream of water has cleared out this clogged mind of mine

ANGIE, do not fall into darkness anymore! (promise)
what is not right in the eyes of God do not have to remain even 1 second in your mind.

discovery

everyday is a discovery journey for me

unveiling every darkest secret, background and past

forgotten but keep coming back to haunt

so says, elephant never forgets

so am i

my subconcious is so strong that it digs and buries

my subconcious is equally strong that

as i think and dwell on matters

it just unlocked all these forbidden

prisons and the captives run wild

creating havoc in my mind

like a war-torn battle field

the lessons i have learnt from this mentality i am born with:

(1) take authority over my own mind
(2) overcome not neglect / ignore / suppress
(3) speak in tongue whenever all hells break loose, submit my soul and spirit to God
(4) find a victorous way out, no matter what, do not dwell in it but climb to the peak and conquer it.

hope to discover diamonds not coals....in time to come...

childlike dreams

in a nutshell......

Life asks of us for a contribution

and it is up to us
to discover
what it should be

what it could be.....

sometimes things happen

and appear as coincidences

but...

they are not......

you can ignore that for once

but not forever

it means something

it will come back again

to haunt you

to beg for attention

in a nutshell...

what do you ask from life?

be careful of what you aks
because...

We get what we expect.

however...

We cannot perceive

what we do not expect

in a nutshell....

The greatest achievement was at first

and for a time

a dream. The oak sleeps in an acorn,

the bird waits in the egg, and
in the highest vision of the soul

a waking angel stirs.

Dream are the seedlings of realities.

in a nutshell.....

imagination rules

Albert Einstein arrived at

his scientific conclusions

about time and space

by mentally projecting himself out

among the planets where he would ride

around on moonbeams.

His ability to become childlike helped him

to become great among intellectuals.

the next time

you are riding on your imagination

remember
Setbacks are a part of the plan of things.
Off course.

Correct.

Get back on course.

you are ready for your next ride in life.