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Daily usage of HKN

This new blog could be used for daily devotion purpose
as we have a widget from RBC ministries
There are also updated "Bible Verse of the day."
Surfing the internet could be a devotional time too.

Other than that, if our visitor would like to search for a bible verse or would like to use a keyword to search for bible verse, we have a widget for that purpose too.

Visitor could read news or watch videos from youtube as we have the mentioned toolbars too.

To know if anyone in our network has any new blog, just log into our HKN, and you will know.

This is a platform about everything you need to know about us.

All viewers are welcomed to leave a message and comment to us.

Any enquiries and suggestions would be attended to as soon as possible.

Functionality of Hope Kuantan's blog

Looking at the interface of the new blog,
you could see the introduction, vision statement, our FACEBOOK BADGE.

Our contact such as email: www.hopekuantan@gmail.com, facebook profile: Hope Kuantan Him, HIM official website: http://www.byhim.org could be found. We have made ourselves as accessible as possible.

In these blogs, posts will be divided into a few topics:
Now available are:
(1) Daily
(2) Band of Worship
(3) Bloggers

Many are to come as we continue to gather more editors, the proposed are:
(1) Be inpired.
(2) Music
(3) Testimonials
(4) Caregroups
(5) Church activities

Through this blog, hopefully our whole church could be mobilised to move in a more efficient, creative, vision-oriented and organised manner.

To God be the glory, forever and ever.

Online library

A decision has been made to create a subsidiary blog
to contain reading materials into
http://hknonlinelibrary.blogspot.com

there are a few topics divided here:
(1) Devotion
(2) Tough questions
(3) Inspiration
(4) Relationship

for the mean time....
we will keep adding new topics in the future.
This blog is dedicated for reading simply,
clear and easy on the eyes.
relaxing and without much fuss.

What you expect in a library, could be found here...
However, we have just adapted articles for it is easier and more comfortable to read on the computer.

The birth of HKN

i am very excited that Hope Kuantan has a new blog.
It is to showcase everything about Hktn.
The name of the new online platform is Hope Kuantan Network
with the add http://hopekuantan.blogspot.com/

Our leaders prepared a lot of materials for teachings.
Some of the materials are taken from Hope's teaching materials, from other pastors' sermon and from reliable online websites.
These filtered, edited and made relevant to our culture's information are too precious to be just stuck away.
Thus this blog could document all these precious information.
Here, everyone can look into the materials even after church session like sunday service, care group, prayer meeting or shepherding.
We could even elaborate and conduct some in depth searching.
Other than that, our church is always looking to raise new leaders to come.
A leader is a learner.
We are all future leaders in making.
Thus we need to put some effort into studying, researching and thinking......

I am very thankful for the knowledge and truth contained in the Bible.
If these important recordings are not dictated, we would not know the truth.
Therefore, what is important need to be recorded; safe and sound:
written, saved in hard drives or even stored in virtual world like in a blog.

To promote this blog, several invitations have been made to the bloggers in our midst and in the facebook. We have left comments in the blogs of other hope centers' .
Through this network, we can get in touch with members and also other centers.
Although the objectives of this establishment seems to be ambitious,
we see that the purpose will be slowly revealed.
Into God's hand, we commit our serving and hearts intention.

everything artistic blogs

ahhhh......
it was so great

i stumbled upon some blogs where artistic people showcased their creation

of thoughts and observations and transform them into art works

let me introduce:


(2) http://ilovecuppacakes.com/

this is a blog worthy to check it out..the business partners are Malaysian design graduates which embark into business world for their love of cakes and design works. In their little cafe in Kuala Lumpur, they had a corner with design stuffs for sale too. The shop is "Wondermilk."
i really love them for their hard work, creativity and so inspiring....

(6) http://www.studiolodesign.fr/





(7) http://designerslibrary.typepad.com/designers/library/




(8) http://www.curiosityshoppeonline.com/

cute blogs

these are a few websites and blogs which sell really cool stuff.

check it out....

anyway, i am dotting them here in case i need to refer to these cute websites in the near future to purchase or just as reference...(i am so happy)











(3) http://www.ginkopapers.com/store/




(4) http://www.tapeswell.com/



amazed by blogsphere............

these few days i was so busy looking through
many wonderful blogs through kim gray stylish blog

i am so amazed that i cannot stop exploring
and i could not stop
there are so many great bloggers out there, they are:
- designers, artists
- art enthusiast
- event planner
- wedding planner
- caterer
- ahhh....i can't finish mentioning

in a way or other, they also sell personalized and one of a kind stuff

these are a few i recommend, check it out yourself:
i bet you cannot stop looking, like me too (haha)
you can click on the address to visit these blogs:



















clueless

sometimes we are so clueless......
we have been climbing, reaching up and keep going...
once getting above, we look ahead
and found the view so different and unexpected
could it be...
we have been laying our ladder against the wrong side of the wall?

this is such a painful experience
too painful to admit
so painful to even climb down and
start again...
start from scratch

God gives me this word of console in
my deepest sorrow and long-search
of why is it that we will lose momentum after some time?
boredom and frustration seeps in....

in mandarin (di yi chi) means first time

it is the beginning...
start from beginning
everything is a start
we have to have the excitement like it was the first time
we see, feel, touch and of doing...

when we are in emptiness and clueless
that we will come before God
with a mind totally cleared of distractions
deeply seek for His Guidance
after a while, we gain more confidence in ourselves
and less faith in God

this is when imbalance and momentum lost....is seen in us

dear readers,

remember the clue:

first time....start anew

me vs the world

and again,
i felt that this world is against me
i have done nothing wrong
not that i have done anything righteous

i thought it is out of my kind intention
i guess i need to be wiser as i get older
more convicted in my actions and heart motive, so that i would not react to stupid tricks by the Satan and his clique

i have a whelming response bulging from my chest
to proclaim,
"i dont care. ok. does not concern me. "
WHATEVER mentality, it is scary, unwise and plain silly.

however,
i realize that i need to accept the testing by God, Devil's attack and of men (the gullible and the self-righteous type)

You have seen the depth of their vengeance, all their plots against me.
Lamentations 3:59-61

though it is my weakness, God shall use it to honor Him.

i always believe that God is my defender and my protector.
He will judge the living and the dead.
i do not have to be angry and fall into unforgiveness.
does it matter who is right and who is in the wrong?
to judge is to judge upon ourselves.

If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.
Mark 3:24-26

it is wartime...
not between people (we need to unite in love and spirit) - no Satan can break this bond of love

I CAN LOVE
I CAN LOVE
I CAN LOVE

But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed.
Romans 2:4-6

it is against the unseen spiritual entities

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Ephesians 6:11-13

but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members.
Romans 7:22-24


i want to repent before GOd.
God, make me a new man
no longer come against you
and your loved beings
once and for all
take way all these pain and struggles
because you have made these yours
You died on the cross for my baggages and bondages.
Amen.

(Dear readers, this is my constant struggle. it is like wrestling with yourself. This lesson is a repeated lesson. Each time, it gets better and i realize that i come before God earlier and earlier. I believe that one day, i can complete this lesson and can teach others on this issue too)

fear of the known

a sudden emotion surge over me...
it is just me...
i am well over challenges and the unknown
animosity makes me excited and can' t wait for the truth to be revealed

the known, instead make me fearful
that life is only just
just plain

it is hard sometimes....
it is as if you could predict
and you think back to yourself, "it is just in my mind or it is real..."
it is like, "i don't want to know,
please keep it suspensing and surprising."
"don't tell me, make me keep guessing.

all this while, i thought that it was a healthy mentality
"to make a difference, take the road less taken."
now i reconsider,
"is it that i have a secretive side and carnal pleasure in it?"

i write this in open
because this is not a stronghold

For Christ has overcome it,
by the Power of the Cross, i shall yield to my Lord,
and submit to His Will.
Change me our Lord, renew my mind because this has cause me struggle.
Amen.

Now, far and beyond

Luke 14
28"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? 29For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, 30saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.'

31"Or suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Will he not first sit down and consider whether he is able with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? 32If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. 33In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple.

There are a few basic questions i ask myself before i went all in to do something, anything:

(1) Would i be able to complete it?
(2) Would i give up when i find myself alone in it?
(3) Would i complain / argue / bad mood half-time?
(4) Can i stay humble and teachable?
(5) Can i raise someone up?
(6) Can i give praise to God?
(7) Would i say " i will never want to do it again in the future" and throw in wet blanket?
(8) Can i stand up to critism, harsh words and cold water?
(9) Can i keep up the momentum from the beginning to the end with peace and joy in my heart?
(10) Why do i do the things i do?

The parable above holds tight to my heart...
Before i make any decision or along the path i chose, i repeated ask myself....and quote the verse...

God, i want to go far for You. I want to complete this for you. i will offer you half-finished offering no more...By Your Grace, it will be done. Amen.

why do i blog?

many people will ask bloggers:
why do you blog?
so boring....so meaningless

to me..................
blogging is not just a life expression
is a thought processing process
it is a venting and release mechanism to me
like praying and pouring out to friends
blogging will not harm or stumble anyone
it will just obediently listen to your grumbling and rambling

it is like a dairy, journal and a notebook
for us to record and remembrance
i have a short term of memory
i am really that kind "forget behind, look forward" kind of person
so i have to write down to eternalize it
so that i can rememeber my valuable lessons in life
and the occasions and people that mean a lot to me

as you are reading my blog,
you are looking into my world of
thoughts, joy and pain.....
thank you for being a part of my blogger family
you keep me going, readers, commentators and browsers

journey to plant a church: kuantan edition: part 1

this is a blog i dedicated to a brother who is very creative and a visionary
he is able to integrate concepts of church planting and the great commission into a game
this game is very similar to Monopoly

First of all, there are 4 teams with each team comprising of 2 members
given with rm 500 cash (monopoly cash of course!)
then we start the journey
the seed money given means talent, human resource and motivation

altogether there are 20 pieces of block....
each block has name of a road in Kuantan such as Wong Ah Jang, Beserah, Polytechnic, so on and so forth
some of the blocks are fitted with "S" or "F" sign
S means successes in the journey of church planting
F means failures or challenges we face

each time you step on F or S block
you have to pick a paper slip from the respective basket
each is a statement on why you fail or succeed,
carrying with it is a money value,
whether you receive from the banker (in our case, mother church) or
lost money

each of the block, by the name of a road
you can buy property on it based on our estimated property value
ranging from RM 4O to RM 200

you should start from buying the land
then proceed to building
once you bought the land
you wrote on the value paper as a contract
everytime other team step into your property
you can charge them half the value of the property you have invested
we call it blessing the church

then how do we have income?
each time you complete a round and get back to start
mother church will compliment your team: RM 5O

so the more properties you own,
the more probable that other teams will step in
then you can collect blessing

by the way,
there is a block "spiritual warfare"
once you are inside, your whole team will be rounded up with a string
you can only be released when you roll "6" on your dice
otherwise, you lose a round
and just keep rolling until you get "6"
otherwise you just stay in the box

by half an hour, all the boxes will be filled up....
then we have completed the great commision to plant church locally in Kuantan
praise God

this is just a preliminary project
brothers and sisters that have participated gave precious comments so that we could come up with a better concept and ideas
thank you to all......

start looking: Mission Camp Testimony

My name is Angie. I am a tutor. I am very grateful to be here, before you, to speak of my testimony of what i have received last mission camp. However, i wanted to start when it all first began.

I remembered when i was first introduced to Hope Church by my sister,Selena, i found out that this church has a vision and very organized. Has great potential. Everytime, i met with the brothers and sisters, they will ask me "Have you caught the vision of God?" I thought it my heart, " What is that?" However, this curiosity kept growing and i started to ask myself: Would having a vision and mission make a difference in me as a Christian?

On 28th August 2009, 2889, is a very special encounter with God. Finally i can tell God that i catch the vision. Finally, i understand. My whole life can be summarised as our vision statement. I knew, affirmed, confirmed, am forever a part of Hope International Ministries.

So, whenever i have the opportunity i like to ask , "have you catch on the vision of God?" The experience is indescribable. It was like you are looking for God and suddenly you realised that God has already found you, when you have not even started looking.

This mission camp was entitled student mission camp, organised by Hope KL to train the students and support Hope Kuantan and Hope Kuala Terengganu.

What have i learnt in the mission camp?

i believe half of you have joined and the other half have heard what the other half have experienced. And everyone that has a facebook, can look at the photo of our adventure. It is mostly on exposure to new culture, how to compile information and interview locals. it is assimilation and adaptation to a new place. and also incorporate teamwork. Our team comprises of many centers..So you just have to adapt to their styles and lead and influence and come back together as a team to accomplish the many tasks at hand.

the most challenging was the strenuous activities and time stretch, those of us that join the amazing race (Grace) from here to KT and back (back to back), summed up, eh, not that difficult after all....the real mission is 1000 times more demanding. so we need to walk the first step. the teachings are summarised and simplify for us so as starters, so that we could understand. I have the manual here. You can read it.

Before Mission Camp, we are all preparing the 9th anniversary. Siew Ling has briefed the history of Hope Kuantan, since birth until now. There is a very special verse, Hope Kuantan will be Model Church and Mission Sending Church (MSC). When this was first and many times prohesied before, i doubted it....Is it possible? Everyday i repeated look at it because it is one of the exhibition material. And i see hope. When mission camp is announced, approaching and finally arrived, i see that God really wants to set this church as MSC. Now, Hope KL is the headquarter of global HIM. Our church is the extension of Hope Kl, the earliest and most organised church in East Coast. We have a great responsibility. The world will be looking at us as example if not the churches some members sitting right here will plant in the future. Brothers and sisters, it is international business we are talking right here. And you are enterpreneur of the future and to conquer land for Jesus.


If you think mission is a hard work and may cost you your life, think again. i tell you, now it is so much convenient and enterpreneurially. We are very fortunate compared to missionaries of the past. We have Mission Department that compile information, filter and develop Business Plan for us. This Mission Camp is an example. Our target is M238. Reaching out to countries globally, targeting metropolitan and booming cities. There are mission support group that will conduct Spy Trip, leaders and a team of mission-goers to plan your entry vehicle: to study, work or start a business. Every possible question in your head about mission work can be answered by the mission department. This is a workable and 100% foolproof plan. You will never be alone in mission work as long as you are accountable to the church.

I remembered last time i went to MPPO, a church planter of Peru from Hope Singapore mentioned that Malaysians are very adaptable in a way that we are always exposed and lived in a cross-cultural environment. On average we can communicate in 3 languages and we show no preferences to people of any races and traditions. And better still we live in an Islam reigned country. we understood many aspects and lifestyles of Muslims. We are just made to be missionaries. And then i see myself living in Malaysia as a preparation to be a missionary for God.

Maybe you are thinking, mission is not for me and it is not for everyone. Of course not. God will not force on us what we are not willing. Think it this way....Missionary and mission is a lifestyle. Look at the big picture. you will see that serving in a church is preparing you to build another one in the future. When you think and act like a missionary to be, you will be able to change all the bad habits and keep on having breakthroughs in your life.

Fellow brothers and sisters, again i stress that there are mission goers, senders and support. You do not have to leave your spot to be a part of this vision. Let us embrace the missionary lifestyle. Then you will be more willing to give to the church and bear more responsibilities, you will have less problems, conflicts and inconfidence because these will become smaller in comparison to the big picture.

And your serving would not only reach to be a caregroup leader, praise and worship....it will be extensive, all rounded as our core team has taught us to be....serving is not only serving in the church or of positions, but serving people and having a serving attitude.

When i am counting my days to my coming birthday, 8 December, i am going to be 27 years old. what have i done for my God? When am i going to be ready for the mission works? It all starts here, ground zero, in kuantan. This ground we are standing is our mission field. Our family is our mission field. Our friends are harvest to be reaped. Let us start of engine and keep going!

Thank you.

Concidence

Our concept for 9th anniversary
at first glimpse seemed fragmented

i prayed and prayed that one day, our concepts may merge and unite as one
every detail does not stand by itself but complemented the big picture of it

i saw a ray of hope this time

let me guide you through:

(1) decoration and backdrop

the banner showcases a field of wind-shuffling wheat in the midst of a landscape, airy, breezy, a dallop of sunshine, per-dawn state
there is a tree in the middle of it, it is wilting (actually withered), with all the leaves blown away or perhaps fallen off, a sad look.
then another frame of bushy, luscious leaves was positioned on it, dictating refreshing, renewed and bountiful, fruitful, evergreen (you name it)

can u catch the concept?

even the staircase was beautified with the labels "The One." Sweet right!

(2) Special presentation

it is a chronicle of the life stages of fireflies
circling around some bed-time stories
emphasizing that life is short

fireflies struggle to live just for a moment
but it is worth living even for a while

we are like the fireflies
fluttering and meddling our own business
before we now it, life ends....

inspiring!

however, something tells me that God is working through all of us, uniting our thoughts and works

Concept 1: Deco

the big book of inspiration (exhibition) was a cover with leaves with green background
the booklet (exhibition) has a flip-open slit of the front cover ( a leaf too)

Concept 2: Fireflies

our ceiling is ornamented with silvery and golden balls, twirling as a number 9 representing our 9 years of establishment

You call it concidence, i call it the working of Holy Spirit!

a beautiful notation to it: God is working through us to speak to His people despite our differences and time-frame ! Amen.

Beautiful ending.

finally the 9th anniversary came and ended
though many brothers and sisters could not make it with us this time round
it is considered fruitful with a beautiful ending

i was so glad that i can finally stop what i am doing
and i guess back to normal

then, i just collapsed on my bed and dozed off
several times a day
i think the drowsy spell is not over yet
i did not know the toll on me until i finally call it "a break."

there are a discoveries i notice:

(1) we need to strengthen our internal circle, we cannot afford losing any one in our team before we can disciple the new ones.
(2) God really loves my church so much that He will never gives up even when people do
(3) we are becoming busier than ever, which is an unhealthy symptom, you may say that we can be a blessing in our workplace, but when we are not careful, we will drift away, it always comes this way
(4) catch the vision will cure and heal us, let us look into the big picture and all these will diminish, give us the courage to face the truth, let us take charge by the Grace You have given us, let us not deceive our ownself
(5) Satan is deploying a vicious plot, He no longer tramples obviously, we have to discern and humble to see it.
(6) We need to get back on the "Mission Track." We are born, trained, equipped and prepared for this mission.


And here i wish Hope Ktn, long-enduring (9 9 ), evergreen and keep shining for Jesus!

Walk the way

the world wide web is supposed to be a wide world
everything should be connected like a web
however, it is not easy to look for information concerning mission work
it is whether it is restricted or missionaries are too busy to update themselves online
perhaps their faithfulness has come to an end in earth
their work is recorded in a big book in heaven
titled: The faithful Ones

so when i had the manual in my hands
my heart cries, so touched
as if a longing is finally satisfied
a quench thrist
a search is done

to know more about mission work
you have to be there and done that
no words are able to express the experience
the heartfelt of a missionary

i am very grateful to the administration
for providing such valuable teachings
and giving such a support, back up and confidence
to the future missionaries/ church planters to come

missionaries of the past has to go through the dark alley alone
with all these, i can say, trust is built, we are not alone in this
let us step out in faith............
go on strong and far for Jesus
for Jesus had walked the way before us...

vision for mission

for weeks i had felt my pulse quickening and heartbeat paced a little faster
mission camp is coming to town soon
and finally it came

i tell myself, " i must not complain but really savor every moment of it."

first of all, everything was dutifully prepared and laid out
the whole camp was physically exhausting at first but it got better over the time
we stretched ourselves to our maximum without breaking (thank god)

if this is consider tough, we would not be able really to go for mission
in the real world
expand this to 1000 times harder (and that's call mission la)

if i had to give this camp a theme, i would say:

The First Step: Mission exploration for beginners

why?
because it is a fundamental and preliminary work for mission goers
preparations that we needed to do before we step ground on mission fields
background check and cultural exposure of the natives and nations

the practical work that we need to do is a necessity
online, interviews, invitation, team building, community association,
map reading, running places, cook within a limited budget
everything must be done in a specific time and money range
to equip us for mission work

it is not about fun and pleasure
because we cannot afford such leisure in a new place
whether in time, money or energy span

entering into the camp, i was expecting expounding impacts
but it was just mere
then i realize, back to basics are important
we need to build our foundation and be grounded
in order to run far, finish the race and win the prize

what is my prize?
just a meet with Jesus face to face and Him saying,
" Dear, you faithful servant, you have finished the race."

light salt

The world of world wide web is so wide
and i just cant stop recalling the people i have known all my life
the close and the forgotten

the personalites and characters they had
the nicest ones are those who do not know God

it makes me sad to notice their kindness, gentleness and humility
whereas a person like me, pray, go to church and attends the wholesome of you-know-what do not have much difference or no much better

we need to raise up, change and abandon our self and take up the cross
let us be renewed and refreshed

that we can be the light and salt in this world
not a speck of dust or a spit of lukewarm water

people look up to us as the Children of God
not look down on us as fanatics and non-existence

pretender

some people are recognised for their accomplishments, success and credentials
some are known and forever remembered for their attitude in life, characters and impacts on others
some are applauded for their struggle in life and overcoming it, inspiring people to have faith despite circumstances

How do you want to be recognised as?
What do i want to be known for?

we do not seek for personal interest nor seek to please the world
but let us not fool ourselves into thinking that hiding our light under the bed will do any good or honor our Lord

Stop pretending what we, are not and should be!
There is no room for pretenders....
There is no room to be licking our wound and boast on how weak and vulnerable we are...

i feel so sick and tired looking out from the window...
outside, the air is fresher, brighter and happier
why is the house so gloomy and broken?
would our guests feel invited and belonged in this place?

we need to equip and train ourselves...
keep pushing, praying and push some more...
God is laying challenges and pits of fire to get us moving and going
He is not longer here
He has moved forward, we have to go forward to meet Him

Praying, is it an act of faith or a dependency for miracles and easy way out?
God wants to tell us that "it is not easy, not only it is not easy, it is extremely hard and we may have to lay our lives, would you do it?"

Listen to our own cries of prayer?
is it out of faith or fear?
Look at our own actions and change.
if there is none, we do not act out of faith.

We are lying not praying.

2889

browsing through the internet for exhibition materials
has been fruitful
and an exposure for myself

a breakthough and a gain of understanding
in the aspect of vision, spiritual and mentally

it all started with the cutting of the latest vision statement
it had not been easy as it was quite long
in that process, many questions came into my mind
this vision is not easy to be accomplished, if you could not complete this sentence
how are you going to complete this mission?
it has open up my mind of truly embracing this vision and great commision
it is not going to be easy
it is not easy for Paul, Moses, Abraham, prophets, missionaries and even Jesus
it is not going to be easy for me....

but taking this road
as Jesus had walked before me
is a destiny
My destiny.....

The night i finally caught the vision of God was 28 August 2009
A day i will always remember...

silence

so much to say
yet do not know how to start

first i would like to state that what i do most does not mean that it is my utmost priority
but it is necessary for my growth and unity of us
if there is personal interest in what i do, i rather be blogging and msn ing
my favourite past time and venting mechanism would be writing and people
through writing, i could encourage myself and let my mind flow
through msn, i could encourage people where at the same time, do many things
multi- tasking as we are online and such behavior will not seem inappropriate since no eyes could judge

i just could not bear to do only one thing at a time
had to be two at least

hmmm....
whatever i do, i rather do in silence and solitude
as the bible says, do not let your right hand knows what your left hand does
so true, this is to make sure one's interest and intention always lays in God
who sees when no one sees
Amen

By the way, when you do things in open, people may see you overt, hmmm....
have to hide and slow down (just to please others)
some say i am so rush, workaholic and rash,
i guess i am just an epitome of effectiveness
had to do much but at the same time, must seem effortless and breath-easy
it takes a good acting impression

people that say more than what they do ,do not deem respect for what their mouth utter

exhibition

ehm...so much to do...
i spend my sleeping time thinking
and waking time doing

like always
i hurt myself here and cut, unnoticeably
toes and fingers with minor cuts and little bruises
i guess it was during moving the towers of chair
and flipping through papers

no line at home
so has to surf and optimize my time now,
during meal time
thank God, there is wifi every where
who needs to sit and home and surf....ler.

my destiny

my destiny....

Option A- intellectual....like obtaining post graduates and thus, be a lecturer
Option B- working professionals, i do not like to work under rigid regimes like engineer
Option C- business like, nothing is more challenging that to oversee many aspects of business and solving minor to major issues
Option D- charity and volunteer works.... my latest venture and fave

Option A is a life-long intervention. Like every kid, i thought of myself getting the most prestigious and time-consuming education. It has been my dream. Being a lecturer and educator seems nobel and not perplexing.
Option B, working is tedious and a gradual, stable and predictable progress...from an engineer to a partner and then own a private firm. very comforting and assuring.
Option C is an unknown option until i joined a multi-level marketing business, it opened a whole new level and perspective of my sight and insight of life. After that i joined my now local church, that has a vision that sounds like this:
Our vision is to fulfill the Great Commision by raising Christ-centered disciples to build vibrant and biblical churches in Kuantan, East Coast, Malaysia and all over the earth.

How does it sound? it is very enterprenuering especially in the last term (all over the earth) it captures my attention and redefine my life venture.

it fulfills my:
Option A: Disciple (means to teach)
Option B: Build churches (i am a civil engineer graduate)
Option C: all over the world (very business like with an entreprenial spirit)

How does my option D comes by? i find myself pulled into this direction mentally and spiritually. I always think, consider, plan and excited by projects of reaching out to people and bridging people into the church and God. But, all i am lack of is the first baby step, wobbly little few steps, the fall it will bring and the fight to get back up again. You must know, charitable causes are non-profitable and funds need to be raised. Social awareness has to be cultivated.

From my engineering education, a concept is always vital and crucial in my every endeavour:

Sustainable Development: a project that will keep going, recreate revenues, even after the original establishers are not around to supervise. the foundation is very important, each methodology must consider how it will propel and propagate the whole project. it is life-creating.

9th anniversary: The One

this time round, we will be having our 9th anniversary
the theme would be "the one"
in mandarin "wei yi."

like always, i am excited and over the moon (over dramatic)
there are suggestions on how to present it
the concept is how one person could make a difference to the world
and change it

when one individual arises with a new concept and invention, he changes the way others live
the power of one
the examples will be like albert einstein, michael jackson, missionaries, air asia....
people who are not afraid to step out, do things differently, and pave a new path, not restricted by what is possible in the eyes of common men

in short, it is common men doing uncommon things

the theme will be gradually revealed....
on the backdrop of the stage

(1) Are you the one?
(2) Are you ready to become the one?
(3) You are the one
(4) I am the one
(5) Finally, the one..... (wow, splendid)

before that, our wallscape near the staircase has to be refurbished
the surface is already dismayed by the tearing off of previous vision statement

many things to do, AHHH.....

vision

my church is a visionary church, building visionaries of the future
however, i did not feel that it is realizing any sooner anymore

every church member has to quote the vision statement
but our vision statement has been amended months ago

i can only wonder who really memorize the new vision statement
it is such a pity
my church is once a church so founded on the Great Commision
we are once so sure what to do to expand His Kingdom
now, my church lost its original flavor

our vision is entwined with the church's, used to be

now....so slurred and blurred
what are we doing in actual?

i am "mo mo"

"mo mo" is a mandarin term
meaning
- silently
-enduring
- quietly

i am "mo mo"
it is a term i use to describe myself, i prefer "thinking to talking."
a term i use to remind myself to be "patient and control my tongue."
it is an integral part of me, my personality, i am introvert in a sense i need peace and silence to work my creativity and imagination
havoc and chaos madden me, block my mind, i find it disrupting...

interruption, interception, dominance, infiltration, indoctrination
i find these disturbing and menacing

mo mo chen sou (long-enduring)
mo mo cheng zhui (self-exam)
mo mo chi dai (hopeful)
mo mo tau zhui (lost in thoughts)
mo mo teng dai (patient)
mo mo reng nai (self-control)
mo mo .......

the realm of " mo mo" is not
solitude nor lonely
because this is where i meet God
and His Presence
where we have long talks
and refreshing to me

when i am " mo mo", i am with God
in that total silence
i hear His Whispers
i hear Him
i feel Him
i am in Him
i am the vine, He is the branch
i remain in Him and He remains in me

favor

Gift of favor
is the ability to have others likening and
deemed pleasing to people around them

a brother once taught me,
it is all right when others dislike you
instead pray f'or
"Gift of favor."

Puzzled,
in my mind, " Can meh?"
i did not know that we can pray that we gain the hearts and favors of others
as the bible states,
we gain the favor to bring people to Him
of course, we could pray and able to do so
because it is biblical

Gift of favors encompasses:
- smile often
- have healthy self-esteem
- correct living attitude
- is a practice as we communicate and mix around
- usually likes people, otherwise is imposibble to accept others and favors

other terms include:
- friendly
- pleasing
- pleasant
- amiable
- helpful

by dictating so:
it is impossible to not have gift of favor, do you agree?

as it is like other gift, it is to be practiced, passed on and used to the fullest
to serve God and His People
Amen

blessings

what are blessings?

- rewards?
- promises?
- prosperity?
- gain?
- position?

i longed for these too....
however, God witholds these from me
the God who gives abundantly is holding back

But yet, He who holds my future and my life
takes the longest time
preparing the most enduring gift,
Character

He gives me the hardships, challenges and doors to
run back to him
when
i faced the temptation
to react harshly to circumstances and people

i learn not to be influenced and crushed by conditions
which will be shifting and everchanging

yet,
He teaches me to be patient, long-enduring
understanding
putting my trust in the One that is everlasting and ever-knowing
understands that life is not going to be easy
but will be worthy of living and suffering
as we suffer, we suffer with Him who dies on the cross for us
it is the most blessed blessing of all
to be with Him who overcomes Hades and Shades of Sorrow and Darkness

Pain is gain
No pain, no gain
To live is Christ, to die is gain
Glory be to the Lord who was in pain , now in gain,
gaining back our souls and redeemed us.
Amen.

eagerness

eager to lead or /and

eager to serve


is it the same thing

or different thing


we serve to receive praise from God

or from men?


the main point is are what we are doing is considered as serving?


servant:

(1) serves from his heart

(2) the right hand does not know what the left hand is doing

(3) run the second mile

(4) do in spite of being told

(5) humble in action and gentle in speech


Do we continue to serve when...?

(1) not in the presence of others

(2) when we are the lowest, down in the dumps

(3) evoked and provoked

Hope

i am in Hope for a reason
we sleep "hope"
eat "hope"
breathe "hope"
and give "hope."


Hope is what we are and what we embody

we radiates "Hope" to the people around us

Floodgate of thoughts

My eyes are drooping. My head is throbbing. Fingers hurriedly clicking on my computer. The server is slow these few days. It is driving me crazy, pinned me up my ceiling. Could not catch up on the dramas I have lined up to watch.

Sad….meantime, I know that there must be more purposeful things to do since God does not allow my line to flow…. So I read and played computer games.

Of course, my mind was on something else as I diligently solved my solitaire, freecell and mahjong titans. I always used these games to allow my mind to flow and conjure. My mind is like a queueing loading.

Whatever questions and inquiries which are presented to me will be processed. I can’t seem to filter it. Sometimes, I even despised when a situation or condition is said or seen, anything I could capture with my senses; sight, hearing or feeling, knowing that another item is in my “thinking list.”

AGAIN!! Stop it… I am actually thinking when I am not consciously thinking.

There is always streaming in my head….not physical entity, un-understandable. If I have to describe it…it would be like cloud, but more fluid in state. Formless but keep on flowing.

It is like I am thinking of others’ thoughts. Cannot seem to comprehend. But then as others speak and act, I seem to understand it beforehand or just thought of that seconds before… if I say I could feel what you feel and know what you will say, would you believe me…maybe it is coincidence.

But it has happened for several times now, more frequent recently. And it is not with just specific individuals. But several, especially if I am dwelling about the person and thinking hard… So I am so full of feelings, some are just not of mine.

And yet, I will not be brought down and negative brawled by these realistic emotions. It is as if I could comprehend how my Father in Heaven bears our burdens and incompetences.

Is this a spirit of compassionate?

Is this the work of Holy Spirit? You must know that my heart is at peace.
Of course, tears do come. But it is of relief and touched that God is so near.

That each moment, my heart is soothed by Jesus, himself.
I feel so fortunate that He is so near me.
So near that each heart beat reminds me of Him, that He is my heart.
I think God is helping me to draw the line between emotional and compassionate. There is self control, light and hope in the “Passion of Christ.”

Fear in me

This is an important concern to me.

Every gifting comes with a weakness and a possibility of a trap in it. (of course laid by the devious one)

When the word of God tings to me, “that every challenge that comes our way, He gives us the strength to overcome it”, I just could not shut out these flowing tears.

We are sinners, so succumb of sins and pride. Used by God for His Kingdom, but we are so simply ignorant to the Satan’s entwined, twirling, back and forth deceptions and lies and fleshy desires. Vessel of God and un-God at the same time.

I am a sinner but His Grace could turn this prisoner of sin to a now professing “I am a saved soul.”

This is a reminder to me to keep very close and accountable to God. I admit that I am weak. I need God to work with me and work through me, so that I could be an ambassador of God.

Without You, what am i? Nothing.
The pure existence and thought of You, made every insignificant favors into significance, because it pleases You, it blesses Your Kingdom.

Knowing that I am a part of your Kingdom, knowing that I reign with me, gives me value and purpose.

I am so glad to know You. The slight tinge that I may lose sight of you saddens me.

Is this fear, fear of the Lord? But I know that you will never leave me nor forsake me gives me hope.

That is the faith that keeps me going despite these understatements.

When my fears are cast onto You, nothing is fearsome.

There is only a fear, fear in You, my dear Lord!

Be still

Be still..
This is how my heart yearns, longed and just…is.

No external words, reactions and actions could compel my heart to darken and grieve. It is meaningless compared to Your Love.

Because Your Love dwells and overfloods my heart. That no bitterness and hatred could stay in. they are flushed out by Your Precious Blood.

As the days grow by, the more of Your Grace flows into me.

Your greatest blessing is not prosperity, achievement nor humane values. If we put my faith in these shifting values, we are nothing more than a wave hitting onto the shore.

It is more than that. It is You. You here with me, now and forever. What could be more precious than that?
I want to remain in You, in Your words.
Please lead me not into temptation and astray. All I need is in You.

The sandy eye

“The speck of sand in others’ eye is so much bigger compared to the plank / log in our eyes.” Such a sarcasm.

A lesson to be forever remembered. A keen reminder that got stuck with me over some circumstances. 3 times I heard that day, twice from myself and once from other.

We are prone to point fingers and find fault.

And I am keen to point out the people that point fingers.

And at the same time, who am I to point out. The sand in others becomes the plank in mine. This is a vicious cycle. it may turn around to me, you see.

It is all in the methodology and solution. A careless step and a mindless tackle with turn the table around. At the end, I may be the devil’s tool even if at the first place, I have the good intention in mind.
That is why God teaches us about forgiveness, the sand-plank story, left cheek parable and unity.

(1) Use gentle approach and reproach. It works all the time. It is how Jesus will do it.
(2) Self-righteousness is deceiving to oneself. Stop deceiving yourself! (I am saying to myself)
(3) Use principles of God at work in everything. Good intention does not make it a godly intention!
(4) When not to say it is as important as when to say it, if not the less.
Some seek to be solved, some are better to let go and let it pass, some are to be endured and overcame!

His hand moved the clouds

When I was walking with my brother one sunny day, a biblical story comes to life. Remember when the Israelites led by Moses in the desert. That pillar of fire with them at night and the pillar of clouds by the day. We are the Israelites that day as the clouds covered the bright surly sun that day as we walked. It is the promise of God to be with us. Giving us the authority of heavens and earth. An assurance that He hears and provides! What a wonderful promise! The clouds swiftly moved to cover the burning light. Just as a lover would bring up an umbrella to shelter his loved one. His hand moved the cloud. I was my God’s lover that day. So sweet. Of course, I am His Lover as He is mine, now and ever.

the blue sky....

she raised her hands to the sky
and said, " the blue sky."
first time when she was ten
the second time, she was 25

a little girl abducted at the age of 10
for 15 years in the basement of a farmhouse
captivated in darkness and inhygienic condition
received the abuses of any thinkable and unthinkable actions

waiting for help and rescue...
gradually losing hope and gave up....

one day, after 15 years
she escaped
and murdered 3 other people
who in her mind have neglected
and caused this impediment onto her

who could have blamed her?
anyone could go insane in such circumstances
a person so secluded could be delusioned
and drived insane

i could not blame her...

anyway, this is an episode of the drama i watched: "Mr. Brain."

i cried my heart out in the end when the lady said, "i surrender. Anyway, i am already used to be a captive and prisoner."

i reflected on myself;
- i need to see hope
- i will always forgive

forgive the transgressions of your transgressors so that the Father in the Heaven will forgive all my sins

i am glad that God enters my life

Forgiveness is the highest value one could have
and it is found freely in God

to us: sin
to God: forgiveness

i am grateful that i am a reborn Christian
no longer live in the basement of darkness

senses..........

can you hear the unspoken words?
to hear the heart speaks
actions and speech responses reveal the thinking
facial expressions and body gestures can tell what the person is stating and hiding

we collect our information through
- auditory (lsitening)
- visual (we see)
- touch (physically)
- kinesthetic (we feel and sense / intuition)
people communicate likewise too

if we desire to understand
we need to utilise all our senses and
tap into all the senses of others too

walk into the mind and heart of others
weaves our hearts together
to unite and build each other in love and selflessly

it is the observing attitude to be able to contain others into our life
to take away our selfishness and self-centeredness

able to include others into our circle
is the attitude of a godly visionary and missionary

feedback....

how do we evaluate?
- by having meeting and discuss on the loopholes and how we could improve in the future...
- you should...this...that...and should not...

that was how i thought of evaluation in the past...
turning evaluation into a battlefield
the word " evaluation" instils fear and
silence during meeting
i come to conclude that evaluation do not drive but drown team members

so what is the more practical way?

it is called "prevention approach"
along the way, when we find our members having difficulty, short of ideas / time, need assistance
we should step in and offer ourselves freely

in the past, tasks were delegated
and everyone was obsessed to complete their part of work in perfection
it is mine or yours...

certainly it is a mentality to be abolished....

if we have love in our heart and
a true desire to stay united

we would carry each others' burden
we would step in and step up for the sake of others
and in the big picture of completion

by the end,
there was no need of "evaluation"
because we have done what we could do
and tried our best

in the process of helping out and filling the gap,
we have evaluated and giving feedback along the way
in a genuine and sincere way

Do not complain but offer practical help instead!

be hopeful...........

responses, replies and answers
are our reactions towards circumstances surrounding and within us
under certain conditions

i realized that one's thinking is individualistic
and does not necessary means that others think alike or
have the same mentality and understanding too

your opinion is yours
my thoughts are mine

there are too many times
we have made a silly mistake
it is called preconceived notion
we equalize a word or a facial expression to mean something that we have gave a certain meaning to it
as: non-smiling as non-friendly / quiet as not sociable
many times it is not likely such

because human are very tangible and flexibile creatures
there are many sides to a person and
different personality will arise
and definitely, a person changes and develops with time

our responses, replies and answers
should be in positive light
contain hope and belief for the person we interact with
be loving and understanding

cut the slack
and always think the good for others

many times, they mean good
but our reply backfires
and affect in "negative force."

it is not what we comprehend or what others intent to say
but it is in our responses

we could turn any situation around for good
if we are in a "hopeful" thinking mode

courtesy....

i am learning to appreciate the courtesy of the japanese
from the dramas i have watched recent days

they respect the elders, same ranking collegues and their juniors
always bow down and give their respect
it is a value, we , Chinese should learn and remember

no matter what the elders and simply anyone, provokes us
with speech or actions
any sensible Japanese would not speak back harshly
but always act in moderate and respectable ways
the emotional intelligence is what i see as the highest in the whole world

i am so impressed

in a way,
i was stunned when some of the roles are degraded and abused verbally
yet, they answer their abuser in a calm tone and with a smiling expression
that is what i want to learn
able to conquer emotions and come above every negative notations

that is the application of Christian speech

underdog....

underdog...
means the first or second-runner up
not the champion or the sure-winner in contests and competitive

how do we thrive when we are labelled as underdogs?

in every tasks and career path
there are a certain specifications and criterias
that make someone more appealing and forthrunner

to state some:
- highly educated
- good in speech / interaction
- meet up to the expectations of the superiors
- aggresive and opinion giver
- good management skill
- leadership quality

(and many many more)

so, is it necessary to fulfil these requirements to join in the ranks of champions?
stand tall as the elites....?

underdog...may not be seen as the brightest star
but this word has a certain sting and unpredictability about it
that the underdog may over rule and run the race at first place in the end

so why would people be underdog?
why do we even label some to be underdogs?
why do we divide people into groups of leader ranking and underdog ranking?

is that being an underdog..is a technique not to draw attention to themselves?
to be able to do things in a free mode (not succumbing to others' standard?
to be able to do things their way despite the norm and regularity?

just to tell people that "i am who i am..."

Healing hands and killing hands

Healing hands and the killing hands

imagine: if a touch could heal...a touch could kill too

a hand that heals (come from God?)
a hand that kills (come from devil?)

a person that has the Hand of God (is godly?)
a person that has the Hand of Death (is devilish?)

What determines who and what a person is?
His actions or what he is capable of?
or his character and heart?
it is the action or the intention that makes the person?

is there a kind killer / life-taker?
is there a bad healer / life-giver?

does the gifting of healing definitely makes someone as a God follower?
and the gift of life-taker makes a person a devil follower?

crazy for you.....

i am a japan drama fanatic...
especially the detective stories
intriguing and captivating
scientific and mind- triggering at the same time
it makes me wonder about the dark period of recent times
evildoers are no longer the drug-obsessed and compulsive, gullible ones
but the educated and intellectual ones
people who knows about the crime pathological
i guess dramas like CSI and police stories educate these intellegent crime doers
crime fighters and the criminals are on the same level
just as equipped with the same knowledge and judgement sense
knowledge will open the mind
but only wisdom will set the mind straight
we are all sinners....(rings true!)

Testimony

Hi. My name is Angie. I am a tuition teacher. my housemate is Tang Siew Ling. Our house is an informal ministry house. If anyone wants to come over and stay, you are always welcomed. (Just to promote!) Again, i am here to testify about the good works of God in my life. This is a golden opportunity that comes every quarter. And i treasure the day it comes as a chance to conclude my walk with God every quarter.

How is my personal life with God? Well, i had the morning until early evening to spend my quite time and devotion with God. i need a long time to reflect and think to function normally in the public. And i would say my God is a personal God to me and He always talk to me in many ways. Through my blog, i could really pour out to Him and learn how to be grateful. When i write, i think and i really do improve a lot in my verbal communication and information articulation.

My life was a roller-coaster ride. up and down. plain sailing and sometimes scary. my emotional uprising is like tsunami, destructive to myself and people around me. And i tried to improve and surrender to God. I observed myself this quarter and see myself stabilised and under control a lot. Example: depression, argumentative, complaining, negative talking, frustration and disappointment, really resides a lot. Sometimes, i can feel that certain scenarios may evoke my anger, repulsion, injustice feeling and blaming someone. Spirit of God soothes and calms me. And i learn to be a calmer and happier person. Do not complain but encourage. Do not play the blaming game but always think of unity and Body of Christ. if you observe, i smile much more than last quarter. What is in the outside will show on the outside.

I am only a human. i do feel that i am lacking and no one understands me (quite a lot). I am lonely, and i learn to be there for people that need me. i crave for love and i learn to care and comfort others. when i feel that i am poor, i give to others. i am a friend to my friend because i needed a friend in the first place. The word of God, ' give and you shall receive' is an integral part of my philospohy of life. Giving in spite of nothingness tells me that i was never lacking but provided by my Lord in Heaven. He gives me so much that i am able to give. He is My Provider and He gives freely to everyone that calls on Him. My God is a faithful God.

my life is a rough journey. i used to envy and despise the lives of the lucky and fortunate ones. Feeling that God was unfair to me and life was after all unfair. Gradually i understood that my Father has a great plan for me. The life that God bestows to me carve me to be compassionate for others, understand the many levels and turbulence of emotions, be observant, grow in patience and learn to serve others. i am still a long way from perfection, but i know i am on the right path because along this way, God walks with me.

And to every brother and sister here, i will always be a supportive figure to all. i may not be able to do much. i am nothing so that i could be everything to everyone. it is a blessing to be able to serve God and you (all). Let us encourage each other and grow together in the love of God. Let us not only love in speech, but in life and actions.


Love, Angie.

cannot breath....

i am emotionally retarded
engulfed by passionate flames
sighted but blinded by desires
i am so wild and untamed
it is so scary and out of control
but as a Child of God
i am no longer controlled by desires
but filled by the Holy Spirit
i do not act on my own will
but in the will of the Spirit
God...help me...give me the patience and spiritual eyes to see
i cannot breathe.....

Died and lived


If we have died with Him

we shall also live with Him

If we continue to endure

we shall also rule with Him

If we deny Him

he also will deny us

If we are not faithful

he remains faithful

because he cannot be false to Himself


2 Timothy 2: 11-13


__________________________________


Above is the relationship between

me, myself and my Lord, Jesus Christ


He has given me new life, not one

but many new lives

chances to start anew

afresh

and now the living me

is living with Him, in Him

and through Him


as each day passes, i know that He has

a will for me.....

it seems that i am burning time meaninglessly

and endlessly

i am so aimless

at this moment, all i need to endure

is not challenges, problems nor mental tolerance

but .....

silentless, plainful but not painful period of my life


Am i losing my sense of direction

or that i am too adaptable

that i lost my senses?

i can't even feel anger, remorse nor jeolousy.

i do not have emotions, it seems

i smile a lot, but it is empty

God, i want to rule with you...lead me to endure these plains of emptiness........


God....i know that in many times, i was and am not faithful

to you...

i trust myself even more than trusting You

i worry so much and disbelief of Your providence and

promise to take care of me forever


And now, i can feel my faith deteriorating

i am looking around,

into these flesh and desires

seeing that it is not fulfilled

nor prospered


i know that the most precious possesion is when i close my eyes, i still know that it remains and never lost....it is Your Love and Grace to me...


Breathing at this moment is Your Promise to me that You have not left me, will never do and always stay by me...It is how You say that You are faithful to me!


Thank you to my faithful Lord! Let me feel Your mighty hands closing on to me, to feel your warmth and closenesss. Amen.

Philosopher's Journey


Philosopher's Journey

_____________


Philosophy is the


1. Love and pursuit of wisdom

2. Investigation of the nature, causes, or reality,

3. A system of thought

4. The critical analysis of beliefs.

5. A set of ideas or beliefs ; an underlying theory

8. A system of values by which one lives: has an unusual philosophy of life.

_________________


My quest to answer these probing questions:

(1) To find out why people respond the way they respond to gospel


(doubt, concern, disbelief, ....there are certain degrees and variations depending on the individual and timing)


(2) Why are "not everyone who call to me will be saved" is uttered by Jesus? Are there different categories of believers? How to define them?

(a Christian that doubts salvation or someone that claims that he believes in all Gods...many more)
(3) How would we, as Christians be able to evangelism in a way relevant to people, connect to their belief system? Walking into their world instead of indulging on own mental world.

( we look things through our own eyes, if we could gain the knowledge of looking through different sight, it would be impactful and effective..)

(4) Does the bible cater for every type of underlying philosophy?

( Meaning that there are bible verses or biblical truth [key] that opens the mind of an atheist, agnostic.....many more)

(5) Everyone has its own priority and definition of life. Is it philosophical or revelation, living the way we do?

( we are holding our stand or living the will of God?)

(6) Can a Christian be a philosopher?

( a theologian= people who pursues the knowledge of God ,does not necessary is a believer)

__________________________


What is your philosophy of life?

What is your purpose in life?



Philosophy = /= Purpose
__________________

How do we tackle the philosophy of a certain person?

Try to ask any question and look into the perception and the way of thinking of the person.

You will find that there are certain abiding and strong view on certain issues.

They always end up looking at things at certain way.

People are stubborn and unchanging at times.

There is an underlying philosopher in every soul.
____________________________
22To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some.
23I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.
1 Corinthians 9: 22 - 23

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